Focusing on real, authentic, human connection has been the key to my success
2022 and 2023 had me flat on my back with illness, and yet I grew as a creative and business owner thanks to this.
Have you ever felt like your career was cursed?
My 2022 felt cursed, personally and professionally.
It started and ended with funerals – first a dear friend's and then my nephew's.
In between, I broke my foot, a war started in a part of the world where I had friends, and I spent months in and out of the hospital supporting my nephew and our family as he battled cancer.
Every big promotional push I did failed. All of the tricks and tools online marketers told me were guaranteed to work fell flat. At one point, I got banned from Facebook because I was soliciting sex.
(Before you ask, no, I was not soliciting sex, but a strange man I didn't know sent me an unsolicited offer to pay me for sex, which somehow got ME banned from FB... sigh ... patriarchy).
My novel was a super bright spot in the middle of it all, and there was a lot of hype around it, with multiple agents interested in working with me and one even telling me she thought I could get seven-figures for it.
But even that bright spot became a black hole, as publishers came back saying that they loved my writing but couldn't get their marketing and sales teams on board. I ended the year with my agent telling me the project was most likely dead.
To top the year off, November came and I hurt my foot again, and ended up in the ER because of blood loss from fibroids.
I turned 40 in December of 2022 and spent most of the day crying, devastated that a year I had hoped would be a bright one was ending in the death of my nephew and what felt like the death of my career.
I had high hopes for 2023 but it wasn't much better.
I started and ended the year in the hospital, trying to stop my body from bleeding out due to fibroids (and trying to get the doctors to take me seriously and stop fat shaming me).
In between, I spent a lot of time on my sofa resting.
And yet, if I judged my business purely by money, 2022 and 2023 were my best years ever.
I took months off, all my big promotional launches failed, and most of my social media was sharing intimate moments with my family, not a polished marketing channel.
And yet I still made six-figures.
I did none of the things I was told would make me money and all of the things I was warned would bankrupt me.
And yet I still made money.
I prioritized my mental and physical health, family, and connecting to people I cared about – both on and offline.
I rested. A lot.
I took months off from marketing my offers or posting on social media.
My website crashed and I didn't update it for weeks. (Sigh, I still haven't...)
And I made more money than I ever had before.
It felt almost like I'd cheated the system somehow. Like I had broken all the rules for financial success, but still somehow became financially successful.
Here I was, ignoring sales funnel and algorithm tips and simply emailing people, or sending them thoughtful DM's.
I wasn't cold calling.
I wasn't pitching.
I was simply connecting.
That real, human, authentic connection is what drew in clients that I love working with, who also love working with me.
Real, human, authentic connection allowed me to fill my programs and sell my coaching in a way a TikTok dance never could.
Real, human, authentic connection meant everyone I worked with during one of the hardest years of my life was the kind of person that I enjoyed spending time with.
Real, human, authentic connection meant that I built a community of loving, kind, understanding humans, instead of a list of transactional clients.
And, in the end, real, human, authentic connection is what got me my book deal.
If you want to truly thrive as a creative entrepreneur, ditch the tactics and focus on real, authentic, human connections.
Making money is great. We need it to survive in capitalism.
But making real, authentic connections is the key to surviving as a human.
And, dear creative, you are a human first and foremost. Don't let capitalism convince you otherwise.
So when you're stuck on that sofa, feeling like nothing you do is working, feeling cursed, ask yourself where you can create real, authentic connections with other humans around you.
After all, it takes a coven to break a curse. You can't do it on your own.
Wondering how you can make real, authentic, human connections while also making money as a creative? Check out my program 33 Asks™: Marketing for Creatives. It uses a sticker chart to help you make connections and build resilience.